Gone are the days of the stigma surrounding masturbation. With the boom in the “sex tech” industry and, well, the internet, it’s far easier to understand the inner workings of sex and how you can do it yourself.
Still, some people might not be familiar with the act of getting it on on their own. If you feel like you’re not sure where to start, we’ve got you covered. There are a few simple things you can do to feel empowered to fly solo.
Know Your Anatomy
If you’re new to you time, it’s time to get to know what’s going on down there. After all, how can you expect your partner to know the lay of the land if you yourself aren’t an expert?
Take a mirror and look around. There are some very important geographic features of your vagina. In fact, the vagina is often referred to as the entirety of female sex organ but there’s far more than that. The vagina is the passageway to the uterus, but, in this case, what’s on the outside counts
The clitoris is the pleasure center. It’s the tiny little button at the top of your private parts, possibly concealed by the labia, or the “lips.” For little surface-area, the clit has 8,000 nerve endings making it ultimately responsible for the big “O.”
It’s not all about the clit, though. Many women reach for the sensitive area surrounding the entrance to the vagina known as the vulva. This sensitive area enjoys a good rub down, like against a couch cushion or on the washing machine.
Do something calming to tell your body that you’re about to unwind. Take a warm bath or shower to steam away the stress, or sit for a few minutes in meditation. When your mind is relaxed, your muscles will be, too, making it all the more easy to enjoy some self-love.
Set the Mood
So you’ve got the urge and you’re ready to fulfill it. Next step is setting up. Get rid of any distractions that might pull you out of your pleasure zone. Turn your phone over and on silent so that messages don’t pop up and intrude on your *you time.*
Turn off the TV, too, unless of course, you’d like to put on a naughty flick to help heat you up. That’s another perk of living in the age of the internet! As they say, if an interest exists, there’s a porno on it. Find whichever one works for you and press play!
For new-comers to self-sex, it’s going to take some practice to find what works best for you. Good news is, penetration is not necessary. Do yourself a favor and have a look around. Lay back and spend some time touching and fondling all the crevices of your coochie. When it starts to feel good, double down and you’re on your way.
One more word of advice: don’t feel defeated if you don’t reach the finish line on your first go. It might take some time to get used to it. As with everything in life: practice makes perfect!